Is it true that routine is the archenemy of passion? My grandfather before going to work routinely carries his wife breakfast in bed. Once he retired, he continued to do so. At seven o’clock the alarm turned off, stood in his pajamas, preparing the coffee pot and four biscuits (no more, no less); and he left the tray on my grandmother’s lap. He kissed her a good morning and turned to get between the sheets to see how she devoured that simple bite.
One day I asked him why he continued with that “absurd custom” when he deserved more than anyone stay in bed until he pleased. His answer was automatic: “it makes you happy and makes me happy to see her happy.” That’s simple!
My grandparents were married whopping seventy years. Today, my grandmother (97) confesses to love her husband as the first day; so much, so that on my last visit to the residence, I was heartbroken when he said he counted the days to join him in the afterlife, where he was sure he would wait with a bowl of hot coffee, four cookies and a proud smile.
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We believe that break the routine is a surefire formula for keeping the flame of love. However, if something I learned from my grandparents is that we’re wrong from start to finish. They are small routines with the couple shared, those microdosis of happiness we breathed the other, the key to a strong relationship. So easy and so simple, as the answer I gave my beloved grandfather years ago.
1. Kiss with heart
When we start a relationship with someone, we welcome your kisses with the same excitement of a child on the day of the Magi. However, with the passage of time, kissing loses that aspect of hope and expectation to be relegated to sex and sometimes not even that.
Couples who are satisfied in their relationship not only support often kissing, kissing and consider the quality of these a determining factor for happiness that often they have sex. Good morning kiss. A kiss goodbye before going to work. A kiss before asking what this has left us the day. A kiss because, because I want to kiss you, because today you have the handsome gone up, because your eyes are no longer pose on my lips as before and only know how much I miss …
Well, those silly kisses are invaluable.
2. Hug strong
We offer a hug of comfort to our partner if we find that you need or one welcome when he returns from a business trip. But how much does not shake him in our arms for the sake of feeling his touch or inhale the scent of your skin?
Entangle our bodies is much more than a gesture of affection. It is a way to strengthen the emotional bond, to tell wordless “Hey … I love you and I’m here with you.” In addition, psychological studies on the relationship of couples have shown that hugs improve trust and communication, help us relax after a stressful day and our brain responds to them with an overdose of oxytocin, the hormone of happiness delicious.
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3. Spend time
I know. If it is difficult to find a gap throughout the day to devote to a single, fit our schedules with our partner can be almost impossible. However, the happy couples spend willingly of their time to another rise early for breakfast together, crossing half the city to pick up your partner at work and able to talk on the way back home or the manner of a chat in bed before giving goodnight. The key to run these routines is that the reward is always greater than the sacrifice, lest we forget.
4. Share housework
What can have clean fun or romantic couple? Possibly nothing (you say it one preferred exile at his mother before approaching this thing called aspirator). The fact is that marital happiness surveys claim that couples who share household chores are more satisfied with their relationship than those who fantasize returned home from our parents so as not clean.
In the ranking of household chores, cooking occupies the top one among couples. 60% of couples who cook together are happier than those who do not share this hobby. Apparently, chat in a relaxed manner while you make the sauce and the other pica vegetables, give taste the sauce your guy with the spoon to search the salt or share a glass of wine while you finish making dinner seems have therapeutic effect on couples.
I not know what, but I want to think that it is easier and rewarding to try to keep the good routines with the couple who constantly struggle with “not to fall into the dreaded routine.”